Oh, how I can relate, Grumpy Cat!
I feel really down. My mood is so low and my pain is worse in my hips. I didn’t have much of a desire to leave bed all weekend and I only got up and moving today to get to therapy. The lack of continuity that the safe house boss caused by deliberately denying me my therapy sessions really set me back. On top of that, there’s a lot of hurt and anger that came from that entire episode of my life. I’ve pointed out the upsides of leaving and staying in a safe house, but I have to be honest, there was a lot more bad than good. I’m just choosing to focus more on the good.
I have to call social services tomorrow. The one political contact I made arranged for me to speak with someone there to make sure I’m receiving all the benefits I’m entitled to. I’m 99% sure I’ve already signed up for all I can (food stamps), but it can’t hurt and I do appreciate the effort this woman made on my behalf. I just pray there’s a lot more in her bag of tricks and I just need to be patient.
If I could hit an escape key and just start fresh, even with all the struggles that I would likely face, I’d hit that key in a heartbeat! There’s nothing left for me in this version of my life. There’s so much I could be doing to better my life, the lives of others and contributing to society, but instead I lay in bed day after day just hoping and praying and playing the game that may or may not help me find a home. I’m ready to take it all on, I just need the opportunity to find it’s way to me.