As I sit in bed still sans cell phone, I decided it might be useful to write a bit. Afterall, the potential blog topics are really piling up in my planner. Today was particularly symptom filled. Actully, not until the evening was I feeling well enough to do much but stare into space. I must mention that being phoneless is terribly inconvenient, but providing a lovely escape from my craptastic reality! All you trying to reach me: I don’t give a damn! Bugger off!
I started the day by crushing my finger in a folding table. It’s fine. Just a little piece of skin missing, but it didn’t even bleed. I was up far too early feeling feverish yet again. No amount of air conditioning can help this, it seems! Then, the lower abdomen pain from an angry uterus has me on a tight schedule of acetaminophen doses to avoid a major attack of pain. Oh, and to top off my last pathetic 48 hours, I had a meltdown yesterday evening having to do with my inability to get my mind to accept that my body has physical limitations and that I am incapable of making a living that would allow me to live independently. I realize this is through no fault of my own (my dad’s go-to reminder), but logic doesn’t really have a place in all this. If it did, I’d have housing, so yeah… there ya go. Good work, NY State.
My body is a pile of anomalies. It’s funny, I sometimes joke that my belly protrudes like I’m pregnant. Not always, but most commonly when my adenomyosis/endometriosis symptoms are acting up. I learned from an Instagram buddy that this is affectionately called “endo belly” and there are even hashtagged posts on the subject. It’s a bit reassuring to finally make the connection and realize how common a symptom it is. But, I am tired of wearing sweatpants against my will.
I’m sure some of you have heard the term “drug bugs.” I learned this gem from another patient at pain management. With a typical long wait in that office, the cripples in the group tend to commiserate. I had been exceptionally itchy all over after taking my breakthrough pain pills, but never connected this until I spoke with a woman who had just switched medications because the drug bugs from the one she was on were driving her mad. Her arms were all scabby and raw.
We humans certainly find comical names for the bizarre experiences we have. I must say we sickies are often the most inventive! Well, what else do we have but a lot of time to think and a good sense of humor?!