My days have been spent organizing my new planner (I couldn’t keep my life together without one), watching movies, studying Hebrew and reading. I like all these things, but not when I stare all the same four walls every single day. Even a doctor’s appointment or grocery shopping is something!
I gave in a made the appointment to see my dermatologist about my hands as my internist insisted I do. I also have been dealing with what must be Angular Cheilitis in the corners of my mouth. Not the worst case, but it won’t go away on its own, so it requires a prescription to heal. Then I can go back to swatching lip products. As for my hands, the skin is so fragile, ragged and prone to infection that any improvement would be awesome. Perhaps something to product the skin from tearing is possible, too. I go Monday, so it’s not too much longer, thank goodness.
I’ve been laying low in my personal life because I’ve been having so much anxiety that I barely sleep and I’m afraid for the other shoe to drop. I’m not ignoring anyone, I just have notifications turned off so I don’t make more stress for myself by feeling I need to be on top of everything all at once. One thing at a time. Even the positive things can bring stress, obligation, etc. My therapist’s advice was this same course of action. She’ll be away until Monday, so I really just need to put a hold on things in case something big occurs in the meantime. I’m so mentally unprepared for the possibilities that are ahead of me.
Getting rid of leaven for Passover is in part, believed to also symbolize getting rid of or putting aside our indulgences, unnecessary obligation, pridefulness, selfishness and all the non essential thing we fill our lives with. I suppose this is all chametz that I needn’t be concerning myself with, at least not focusing on.
Maybe we could all do away with some of our personal chametz from time to time and focus on what important and care for ourselves and others in need. I like that concept if I do say so myself!